October 31st, 2015 will be the seventh anniversary of the creation of the Dracula Dungeon Society, established during the Global Financial Crisis to monitor the health and welfare of the world’s vampires. After the crisis, many problems ensued for vampire society. With an increase in human unemployment, people were eating cheaper foods, and as a result, their blood was simply not as nutritious or tasty. People were also going out less, staying at home where they were harder to access. While the world has seen some recovery since this crisis, until recently there had been limited relief for vampires.
The invention of Bitcoin has now changed the miserable condition of the vampires. Bitcoin has made it easier for vampires to make and accept payments from humans without the humans realizing that they are doing business with vampires. They are lured into using this non-traceable currency by promises of lower transaction fees as well as the marketing benefits of being a company that is using such an innovative currency.
Vampires are now using Bitcoin to purchase pints of human blood from areas of the world where the local diet is still rich and plentiful, and the blood is therefore tastier and high in calcium and other required minerals.
Dracula, in his keynote speech at a recent Dracula Dungeon Society conference stated, “We no longer have to depend on local supply or deal with any particular human central bank. We can also more easily evade tax authorities now. The resulting increase in blood supply and ease of doing business has been a source of great joy, health and prosperity for the vampires of the world.”
Happy Halloween!
Disclaimer: This is clearly a fictional report- we do not support the existence of vampires. Additionally, while there are many risks in using Bitcoin that we believe our clients should be wary of, we are not condemning Bitcoin.
This story is reprinted from our October 2015 Briefing, with some alteration. Sign up for our monthly briefings.
The invention of Bitcoin has now changed the miserable condition of the vampires. Bitcoin has made it easier for vampires to make and accept payments from humans without the humans realizing that they are doing business with vampires. They are lured into using this non-traceable currency by promises of lower transaction fees as well as the marketing benefits of being a company that is using such an innovative currency.
Vampires are now using Bitcoin to purchase pints of human blood from areas of the world where the local diet is still rich and plentiful, and the blood is therefore tastier and high in calcium and other required minerals.
Dracula, in his keynote speech at a recent Dracula Dungeon Society conference stated, “We no longer have to depend on local supply or deal with any particular human central bank. We can also more easily evade tax authorities now. The resulting increase in blood supply and ease of doing business has been a source of great joy, health and prosperity for the vampires of the world.”
Happy Halloween!
Disclaimer: This is clearly a fictional report- we do not support the existence of vampires. Additionally, while there are many risks in using Bitcoin that we believe our clients should be wary of, we are not condemning Bitcoin.
This story is reprinted from our October 2015 Briefing, with some alteration. Sign up for our monthly briefings.
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